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  I'd really love to be left behind now, please. I was promised that I could be left behind. Please.

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  Okay, but it isn't actually illegal... Like, no one is going to arrest you or come hunt you down for putting Nutella and Biscoff on the same waffle.

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  I had a thought, and I don't know if it is comforting or terrifying. All of the pain in the world, is also (probably) all the pain that exists. Assuming our planet is the only place with life in this universe, then it also contains and is home to all pain that has ever existed.

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  Fuck... The point about anger being the only emotion a boy with ADHD can show, because of societal demands. Fuck. Yeah. https://youtube.com/shorts/qEukt6HwjpQ?is=xE7hbd7Db5XiNsnC

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  I don't want to mask any more. I can stumble my way through social situations, usually without revealing the fucking nightmare I'm experiencing. I fuck up, and it sucks, but I can usually manage... But, my masking is successful enough that even my wife (who is also #AuDHD ) doesn't see it. She sees the mask and things I'm enjoying myself while she is having a terrible experience. I fucking hate this. I don't want to do this.

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  I don't want to be like this.

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  Does anyone else feel like they can almost ignore being high? I mean, I am still high, but one second I am so dizzy I can't stand and then I just decide not to be dizzy... and it works. Does that make any sense?

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  All I want is ear buds with ANC capable of blocking out all sound, that can detect the ear buds of my spouse, and play her mic in my ears but with the volume adjusted based on distance so we can talk like we were in a quiet room anywhere we go. Is that so much to ask?

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  What is actually involved in resting a soul? Does god have to do it, or can anyone do it? Can you unrest a soul once it has been rested? Does it hurt?

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  I need your help. Ruben is one of our cats, and he is the nicest chilliest cat that has ever catted. Absolutely nothing bothers him (except Queso not returning his affection, but that's a story for another day). He has a nickname, goopy. That has turned into names like Goopert, Goopathan, Gooplando, Goopstepher, etc. That's where you come in. I need more "normal human" names that would fit this pattern. Help!

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  What's so special about carrots though? You don't see anyone asking for broccoli cake or turnip cake... So, why do carrots get to be special?

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  Someone should just rinse the pudding off of the proof.

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  Was McDonald already old when they got the farm? Was there ever a point when young McDonald had a farm?

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  Jack outside the box

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  Why did I wait until my 40s to try this?

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  If you never fuck around then you'll never find out.

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  When is it my turn to get the zoomies?

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  We are taking a hike in the forest in southern Washington, and after a while I noticed my jaw was really hurting, and I didn't know why... Took me a moment to realize, it was because I'd been grinning like an idiot the whole time. Because, I like trees! #Alexithymia

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  Is it against the law to pee and drink at the same time?

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  I'm still working on my keyboard project, even though I've ordered a svalboard since the svalboard will never be portable. But, I'm reconsidering the layout because my thumbs have been incredibly sore lately and relying on thumb keys that heavily won't help. Not sure what to do instead though...

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  At the very last second, I can change direction. Turn completely around if I feel so inclined.

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  I don't know much about Cinco de Mayo

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  She's got a serated edge, that she moves back and forth

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  I really wish there was a way that I could rename android applications... Or, even just give them an alias. I mean, how the fuck are we supposed to remember what the fuck all of these things are? I don't give a fuck about your fucking Internet brand. I just want to find the fucking app for dental insurance, or my fucking bank account, or the app for my fucking door locks. Ugh.

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  As you're born you start dying, so you might as well have a good time.

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  I did a test print with channels for the row traces cut into the bottom of the board. I then used cooper tape, pressed it into the channels and then attempted to cut away the excess. It didn't turn out great, but the results are still promising. I think if I adjust the shape of the channel it will work really well. It needs sharp corners, so I can easily use a razor to trim it. It seems to make really good contact with the socket, and diode legs.

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  Holy shit, I can't believe this is working! I am now generating trace paths (for the rows, I haven't started on the columns yet but that will be easy now). This is fucking cool. All of this is based on a json document defining the key layout.

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  I'm going to be really fucking annoyed with myself when I have this keyboard design done and perfected and then finally get a svalboard, because I know that's what's going to happen.

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  One interesting concept that I have seen mentioned a handful of times while researching keyboard layouts is a repeat key. Basically, a key that just repeats the last key you pressed with the same modifiers. So, backspace, arrow keys, page up or down, etc become easier to repeat, especially if your layout requires multiple key presses for some keys. I like this, but want to extend it to have pairs. Like, if I hit down I want to be able to repeat that but easily hit up as well.

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  The more I play with keyboards and look at different approaches people take to reducing hand pain, the more I keep thinking that a svalboard is actually the right solution... I mean, I haven't tried one, and just buying a kit that requires 3D printing many parts would run about $450!! But, I really like the hand position, the limited movement required, and the trackballs. Sadly, one of my biggest goals is portability, and I don't see how to make those mesh. A svalboard is NOT...